


Make or break

by Boatise



Category: Coronation Street, Paula Martin - Fandom, Sophie Webster - Fandom, saula
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-15
Updated: 2018-11-19
Packaged: 2019-08-24 02:50:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,185
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16631447
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Boatise/pseuds/Boatise
Summary: What happens in the aftermath of the disastrous dinner at Speed Daal with Judge Rattigan.





	1. Chapter 1

The drive back to Paula’s was quiet and moody, the radio barely audible but better than complete silence. Tension filled the air of the cab of the Mercedes as Paula drove slowly, methodically, toward her house. She was surprised Sophie had agreed to head back with her to hers for the evening, Paula not wanting to leave things so negative between them after their combative evening. It had taken some convincing. One thing Paula had learned about relationships over her many years was that allowing anger to fester could turn a small, insignificant crack into an insurmountable chasm before you knew what happened. She had once loved her husband with all her being, really believing that her feelings for him would never shift to anything other than complete devotion. She had been wrong. Twenty years, a lot of life, and two kids later had left Paula a completely different person, wanting very different things than Tim did. She had not been fulfilled any longer with her life the way it was. She had a thriving law career, was a devoted mother, but longed for more challenge, more adventure. He was content with things, she was not. Eventually, the need for more, and a lingering desire for female connection, had lead Paula down a path of betrayal, reaching out for physical fulfillment with her friend Evelyn. It was a short-lived fling, but it was enough to bring her marriage to the breaking point when her husband walked in on them in bed.

Paula shook the horrible memory from her mind and looked over at the woman pouting on the other side of the car. She wanted to throttle Sophie for her immaturity, for not understanding the nuances of life and how to better handle situations. If only people would think before letting their emotions take over and run away with their mouths. But, was it really Sophie’s fault? She was surrounded by adults who did exactly that. Sally had blown off and gotten herself thrown into prison because she couldn’t handle her feelings. Kevin, seemingly mild mannered, was a hot head and quick to throw a fist, or so some of the stories Sophie had told her indicated. Tim had the control of a teenager when it came to his anger. And from what Sophie had said about Rosie, she lived a life of instant gratification and self-indulgence. No wonder Sophie initially seemed mature for her age … she had been the only one with any sense among them.

Maybe Paula was being too hard on her lover. Was she expecting too much of the young woman? She hadn’t given Sophie any notification that either of the men having dinner with her were significant to Sally’s case. Perhaps if she had trusted the young brunette with the information to begin with, some of the disaster would have been avoided. Julian laughed most of it off, but he wasn’t facing a trial wherein Leonard might be presiding over events and already pissed off by Sophie’s attack on his character. Fuck. This was a mess. And Paula knew she was mostly to blame. And now it was up to her to fix. Nothing was going right. She couldn’t get much traction on Sally’s case and the trial was getting closer by the minute, Sophie was angry with her and now she might be facing a disgruntled judge. She audibly sighed heavily, and Sophie looked over at her.

Sophie’s emotions were all over the place. Why did life have to be so hard all the time? All she had done was stand up for herself and not let that arsehole belittle her. Had she known who he was she would never had said what she did, but Paula hadn’t told her anything! How could she not inform her? And why, if she wasn’t going to give her that information, would she choose to bring them to Speed Daal for dinner, where she knew Sophie would be? Her frustration level was off the charts. Why did she agree to come home with Paula? This was not going to be their usual night of being loved up under the duvet. It was going to be contentious and anger-filled, just as their conversation had been at Speed Daal earlier. Paula went on about them not parting with so much tension between them, but maybe little space was precisely what they needed.

Sophie did not like the side of Paula she had seen this evening. She was dismissive and snotty, like her lawyer mates, and it was most unattractive. Up until today, she thought Paula walked on water, so to discover that she had a side to her that was so contrary was disheartening. Maybe they weren’t as well-suited as Sophie had originally thought. Maybe the difference in their age, the difference in where they were in the lives, was going to prove to be too much for them to overcome. Sophie glanced over at her lover, trying to find something redeeming about her to hold onto, to tamp down the sickening feeling that was sitting like a stone in her gut. Doom seemed unavoidable. Paula had her head propped up against her arm as she drove, a look of disdain on her face, a heavy sigh escaping from her. How could Sophie get Paula to understand where she was coming from? Leonard had been an absolute dick to her and Paula hadn’t even tried to defend her. Instead, she made Sophie feel like she had made a huge mistake in saying anything to the judge, guilt filling her when Paula told her he might oversee her mum’s trial.

What was she going to do? She had fallen in love with this woman, who was now just pissing her off. She had to find some way to overcome the overwhelming feeling of being completely misunderstood.

They pulled up to Paula’s driveway and got themselves into the house, still no words spoken between them.

Paula placed her things in her office, kicked off her heels and headed upstairs to change her clothes. She was exhausted, but knew the night had only just begun for the two lovers. She held out her hand to Sophie, motioning for her to come with her.

“Ha, if you think I’m going to put out now, you’ve got another thing coming!” Sophie spat.

“Oh, for heaven’s sake, Sophie, I thought you might want to change into something more comfortable. It’s going to be a long night for us both,” Paula retorted, rolling her eyes at the ridiculousness of her lover’s statement.

Feeling stupid, for the umpteenth time, Sophie sighed and followed Paula up to the room to change out of her work clothes. The two women had developed a comfortableness with one another that seemed to be missing as they awkwardly maneuvered around each other, stripping off clothes, glancing at one another, each struggling to find something to say that would break the agro in the air.

Paula changed into a comfy pair of worn pajamas and offered Sophie the same, which the younger woman reluctantly took, not really knowing yet if she was going to stay the evening. She couldn’t see getting much sleep whilst feeling so upset.

“I’ll be in the living room when you’re ready to talk,” Paula said as she walked out of the room, trying to give Sophie some time. Sophie plopped down on the edge of the bed and began to cry, head in her hands. How had this all happened so quickly? Only yesterday the two of them were texting flirtatiously, not having seen one another for a few days, and Sophie was missing her lover something awful. When she saw her walk into Speed Daal earlier, her heart leapt at the sight of her. Then Paula had been almost cold to her, very dismissive when Julian arrived. It made Sophie feel small and insignificant.

She ran her hand over the duvet on Paula’s bed where they had made love so many times, the memories washing over her – all the passion, the electric connection, the need. It made her sad. Was it all lost? Could they get over this? Sophie gathered herself together, got up and headed downstairs to find out.


	2. Chapter 2

Paula was sitting on the couch, glass of scotch in hand. Sophie knew when Paula drank scotch, things were dire. Sophie eyed the glass. “I am just having the one. Would you like a glass of wine?” The sentence brought Paula back to the moment she knew Sophie was interested in her romantically, sitting there on Sally’s couch, only just having made herself clear about her intentions toward her friend’s daughter – ‘if you see something you like, you should just go for it, don’t ya think?’ That had only been two months ago. So much had transpired between the two women in such a short period of time. It made Paula’s heart ache a little. Her lover was so beautiful, but so young and naïve. Paula knew she had already fallen in love with the young woman, and chastised herself over not holding tighter control over her emotions. Was she letting it cloud her judgement? Was she overreacting because of it?

The scotch stung as it went down.

Sophie decided wine wouldn’t be strong enough for their chat, so she grabbed a crystal whiskey tumbler and poured herself a scotch. She hated scotch, but it would do the trick. Paula shook her head at the antics. She knew Sophie hated scotch. Was she trying to make a point of some sort? Trying to display some sort of maturity she perhaps thought Paula thought Sophie was lacking?

Sophie took a swig from the tumbler, enjoying the weight of the glass in her hand. The liquid hit the back of her throat and she choked a bit as it snaked its way down to her stomach. The burn felt appropriate.

Neither woman knew exactly what to say to soothe the situation.

“This is silly, Sophie,” Paula began, fully intending her statement to apply to the situation and not to Sophie.

Her hackles still up, Sophie turned to the older woman and let it out, “Oh, well, that’s me all over ain’t it? I’m just a silly little girl who can’t keep her big mouth shut.”

“That’s not … can we please agree to stop attacking one another?” Paula pleaded, wanting to throw her hands in the air at how infantile Sophie’s reactions were to everything she said.

“You started it. All I did was not allow that arrogant, patronizing arsehole to treat me like the hired help, no help from you, mind you.” Sophie watched Paula scoff. “If someone had treated you like that, I would have jumped down their throat so fast. But, no, nothing from you, eh? Didn’t want to upset your sensitive mates?”

Paula swallowed hard on the liquid in her throat, watching the level in her glass get lower, willing the alcohol to settle her emotions.

“You know that I couldn’t do that Sophie. I need him on side! If he presides over your mum’s trial, the last thing I need is for him to think my judgement is questionable …” Paula closed her eyes, waiting for the reply.

“Oh, and being with me makes you stupid, does it? Nice. This is a waste of time.” Sophie’s tone was terse. She was ready to bolt and chalk it all up to yet another bad relationship choice.

“You are twisting my words. And it’s bad enough that he has had a taste of your childish behavior,” Paula regretted the words the moment they came out of her mouth, her frustration getting the better of her.

“Childish beh … is that really how you see me? What the hell are you doing with me then Paula? What, am I just a good fuck, part of your mid-life crisis or summit?” a hurt Sophie retorted.

“No!” Paula regretted her previous word choice. “I didn’t mean …”

“Oh, yea,” Sophie continued, running right over Paula’s words. “Let’s see if I can bag me a hot young babe to bed,” she mocked. “Because if that’s what you think of me, then we have nothing left to discuss.” Sophie began pacing the room, trying to do something with her body now driven by adrenaline.

Paula’s anger flared, “Oh, for Christ’s sake Sophie, this is serious and it’s not about you! Your mum is in PRISON …” she was up on her feet, gesturing with her hands, her adrenaline, too, getting the better of her, “and I have been busting my ass trying to find a shred of concrete evidence to prove her innocence, to get the players lined up to her advantage, and all I keep getting is grief. First, your mum sacks me, tries to intimidate a witness and gets her bail revoked. Tim can’t keep his god damn temper under control or his big mouth shut. Gina’s tampering with evidence. And you rudely insulted the flaming judge! You people are making my job impossible!” Paula drained the last of her drink and eyed the bottle on the sideboard, wanting another.

“Well, I’m sorry this has been so hard on you!” spat a sarcastic Sophie.

Paula chortled disdainfully, “Do you really think I haven’t felt the patriarchy well at work my entire career – been called sweetie, or honey or love because I wear a skirt? I’ve been propositioned, discredited, touched inappropriately more times than I can count, but I didn’t let it get to me, because if I had, I wouldn’t have a law practice now. I know all too well what you reacted to Sophie, and the fact that it happens still, all the time, is unfortunate and terrible and it shouldn’t happen, but right now I am trying to keep my focus on getting your mum out of that hell hole! I am certainly not doing all the long hours, digging into every nook and cranny of Duncan’s life because it’s fun! I am doing this for YOU, damnit!” she shouted.

Sophie stopped pacing and looked at Paula, tears stinging the backs of her eyes. She hadn’t considered that Paula had surely encountered the same problems with people in powerful positions throughout her career. It softened Sophie a bit and it showed in her mannerisms.

Paula also backed off, her tone softer. “Look, I am not saying that what Leonard did or said was right. He’s an old, white, rich man, with a terribly narrow view of how the world works, but he’s not an unfair judge. He can be dismissive, sure, but we want him on this case Sophie, and we want him on our side. You did me no favors when you handed him your opinion about his behavior, but …” Paula conceded, “you had every right to be offended by his condescension. I just wish it had played out differently, that’s all. He didn’t say much when he left so I have no idea where his head is. And if he puts two and two together and figures out you’re Sally’s daughter, well …”

“Paula, if I had known any of this I would not have let my tongue run away with me. But you shut me out and I felt like I didn’t matter at all to ya. I know the whole jealousy thing with Julian was stupid, but you need to realize I reacted that way because … well, you mean so much to me and it made me crazy when he was acting so familiar with you. You’re so smart and so confident and I really don’t understand why you’re with me, unless it’s just for a fun young roll in the hay, and that makes me feel like a slapper. I mean, how would you feel if we was with my friends, talking about things you don’t get, like technology, and they laughed at you for being old or out of touch and I just dismissed you as the old lady who I’m with because, oh I don’t know, you have a lot of money. How would that make you feel?”

Paula thought for a moment, “It wouldn’t bother me Sophie. I know it’s hard for you to understand, but that’s what the experience of life gives you. I’ve been round the block a couple more times than you and I am just simply not intimidated by things I don’t know. People rib me all the time about my inadequacies about lots of things, technology being one of them. I can’t bloody well know everything, can I? And neither can you. And the fact that you don’t know the law is not a big deal. You have to let that roll off your back.”

Sophie rolled her eyes at how easy Paula made it all sound. It infuriated her to no end.

Paula noticed Sophie’s reaction and just kept talking. “And furthermore, if I thought you were with me strictly for my bank balance, it would be up to me to remedy the situation. But, I know better Sophie. I know that you are not motivated by money. And you should know that I am not motivated by sex!” Paula moved to refill her drink. “You are beautiful, yes, but that is only one of many reasons I am with you. If I just wanted a roll in the hay, I can get that without a problem.”

Sophie’s eyebrows raised at her lover’s last statement.

“Well, I guess you’re just a better person than I am. I get jealous and I don’t like to be made to feel like I don’t matter! For god’s sake, I share the most intimate things with you, and yet I felt like I didn’t even know you earlier. I was sat there with people who share something with you that I will never be able to understand, and it’s up to you to make sure I don’t feel left out.”

“And those people don’t get to share the intimate stuff with me. Don’t you see it’s just the way things work? I am closest emotionally to you, a feeling that, frankly, makes me a little crazy because it gives you the most power over me. Neither of them know the me you do,” Paula ran her hands through her hair and looked at Sophie with soft eyes. “I don’t think of Julian all day long, waiting to wrap my arms around him or long to kiss his lips, feel his warmth against me. That is all strictly for you, sweetheart. You are who I yearn to be with,” she barely whispered. “And, I wasn’t trying to be dismissive of you, but I didn’t want to parade our relationship around and take away from the reason I was meeting with Julian. I wanted the information on Duncan, but once I saw how upset you were, I did what you wanted, didn’t I?”

“Yes, but …” Sophie responded guiltily.

“Then why are you still so angry at me?” Paula pleaded.

“I just didn’t like that you let Leonard act like a prat and said nothing. I can’t stand men like him, who think they are better than everyone because they have money and power.”

“Well, that’s most men, Sophie. The quicker you learn that the better you will be equipped at learning how to maneuver around them and their high opinions of themselves. How do you think I have survived all these years? Certainly not by having a tantrum every time one did something inappropriate. I had to learn how to use it to my advantage. Do you know how many very important conversations I have missed out on because I don’t play bloody golf? It’s absolutely ridiculous how much importance men place on hitting a little white ball around.” Sophie could see Paula’s frustration.

“Why don’t you play golf?” Sophie sincerely asked.

“I am terrible at it. I tried to learn, thinking that was the only way to get into the party, but because I suck, I had to figure out another way to skin that cat.” Paula half grinned remembering her attempts at playing that silly game.

“So, what did you do?” an intent Sophie asked, very interested in the answer.

“I learned to play squash. I learned to play tennis. I learned how to use my feminine sensibilities and my intelligence to my advantage. Men are so easy, well, people really. I did have a bit of an advantage because I am bisexual and wasn’t afraid to flirt with both men and women when I needed to. I just had to figure it all out as I went along.” Paula said matter-of-factly, remembering how it felt to be on the outside looking in. “Maybe I’ve been too hard on you. You haven’t had a chance to learn the things it took me years to master, and here I am expecting you to just know how to do it all with ease. I am just so frustrated with how things are going, and I feel like the more I try to manage everything, the more out of control it gets.” A forlorn Paula, sat back down on the couch, a bit defeated. She drained the second drink, wincing at the bitter taste in her mouth.

Sophie felt a pang of guilt for being a big part of why her girlfriend was so upset. “I’m sorry for adding to your worries. I know you’re working hard and doing your best and I am not helping by having jealous snits.   But, I will not stand around and have someone talk to me like that man did, Paula, I just won’t.” Sophie had to make it clear that her fight was different than Paula’s.

Softening quite a bit, having now let off the steam that had built up, Paula eyed her lover, “You shouldn’t have to. I think about how I might have reacted if it had been Isla sitting there with me instead of you and I can’t blame you for defending yourself. I’m sorry, Sophie, for letting you down.”

Sophie sighed, a resigned sigh, her heart shifting, her defenses down. “Thank you for that. I need to know you’re in my corner. And, you’re just gonna have to be patient with me, babe. I’m gonna make mistakes and do things you don’t like. But I promise I will try to keep the jealousy under control and trust you.”

Sophie sat down beside her lover and pulled her hand into her own. “I love the way your skin feels against mine. You’re always so warm.” Just touching the older woman ignited Sophie’s desire. She rubbed the pad of her thumb over Paula’s knuckles gently.

“Can we get over this, do you think? Or are you going to be mad at me for a lot longer, because, frankly, I am exhausted with this whole fucking thing,” Paula asked, holding Sophie’s hand in hers, hoping for a positive answer.


	3. Chapter 3

It had been an emotionally harrowing day for both women and all the arguing had worn them out. Paula’s question loomed in the air … ‘Can we get over this? Or are you going to be mad at me for a lot longer …’

Sophie didn’t want to be upset, mad, hurt or frustrated any longer, but it wasn’t only her harboring these emotions. Paula had been equally as emotional at times, so Sophie had to ask her own question.

“Are you going to be mad at me for a lot longer?” Sophie questioned, her voice breaking, a lone tear making a path down her cheek.

Paula shook her head slightly, grasping onto Sophie’s hand a bit tighter. The older woman reached up and wiped at the moisture, framing Sophie’s face with her palm. “No more,” Paula breathed.

Sophie leaned into her and kissed Paula softly on the lips. The kiss was not passionate, it was forgiving and hopeful. Paula got the answer she was looking for.

“Does this mean we are going to be ok?” questioned Paula, looking into Sophie’s eyes with hope.

“Just promise me to tell me what’s going on from here on out, so I don’t do more stupid things that embarrass ya or jeopardize my mum’s case, ok?”

“Ok. I promise. And you promise to trust that my feelings for you are real and you have no reason to be jealous. I only want to be with you, Sophie.” Paula cupped Sophie’s cheek and kissed her again, igniting her libido, the scotch providing a low hum of arousal in her body. The kiss was a surrender of all negativity and they both moaned at the feelings churning inside them.

“Do you think maybe it’s a good idea to go upstairs, or should we talk some more?” Sophie inquired, her lust and desire for this woman returning full force.

Paula stood up, releasing Sophie and walking a few steps away. “I think maybe we should just go up and go to sleep.” The thought that her feelings for Sophie could be misconstrued as all sexual were bothering the older woman. She didn’t want Sophie to think that all she was to her was good sex.

“We can do whatever you want,” said Sophie sincerely. “Personally, I would like to go upstairs and get intimate with MY girlfriend. I’d like to show you how sorry I am about everything. Besides, you had a double scotch and you must be terribly tense and in need of some relief.” Sophie winked at her lover, knowing it would do the trick. Maybe they had had a wobble today, but they were always good at connecting between the sheets. They had something very special there.

“Come here, you,” said Paula, pulling her lover to her, kissing her deeply. She wrapped her arms fully around her, running her hands up and down her back, pulling her as close as she could. She just wanted to feel her, to cherish the warmth of her body and how her own body responded to her lover’s touch. “Let’s go to bed, shall we?”

They ascended the stairs hand in hand, making their way to Paula’s room. Sophie laid Paula down where she had run her hands over the duvet earlier and was so thankful they had managed to work through the hurt they had carried in the front door with them. Sophie’s kisses were sensual and full of want. She pulled back, looking at Paula beneath her. “I’m very glad you talked me into coming home with you,” she whispered, then continued to kiss Paula’s neck, cupping a breast in one hand underneath Paula’s pajama top, eliciting an incoherent response from her lover.

Paula’s body was ready for more, her breathing ragged and wanton. Her physical response to Sophie had always been so intense and tonight was no different.

“Shall I continue, or do you just want to cuddle?” Sophie breathed the question facetiously in Paula’s ear.

“Will you just shut up already and make love to me, woman?” Paula husked, desire dripping from her words as she pulled Sophie on top of her.

Sophie grinned against her lover’s skin. “Are you sure? Maybe we should talk a little more,” she said playfully, pulling away slightly.

“Oh my god, Sophie, if you don’t get back down here right now, I am going to have to put you over my knee and spank you.” Paula whined.

“Ooooh, promises, promises!” Sophie chuckled.

Paula decided to take matters into her own hands. She rolled Sophie off her, sat up and pulled her own top off in one fell swoop then reached for Sophie’s, needing to get her naked. All the anger and awkwardness from earlier had completely gone and the lovers were back in sync. This was the first time they’d had make up sex and Paula was going to make sure it was fabulous and delicious in every way.

Their love-making was slow and reverent, each taking time to touch sensually and worship the body each was exploring. There was nothing rushed or fever-pitched about the sheer enjoyment of each other’s body. Hands and fingertips grazed over naked flesh, inciting goosebumps and shivers. Hot, open-mouthed kisses traversed sensitive body parts, provoking moans of pleasure, spurring on a continuation. Shouts of ecstasy came loudly as nails gripped at burning muscles, ministrations not ceasing until satisfaction was delivered.

Kissing was the most intimate and sensual act and they both enjoyed sharing it immensely. There was something about tasting one another, tongues moving against one another in a slick, hot promise, that spurred the lovers on.

“My god, woman, you are so damn good at that,” Sophie professed, loving how Paula kissed her, pulling her naked body close to her lover. “I could die right now, and it would all be ok,” she breathed heavily.

“Well, I for one, have plans for a lot more of that, so no one is dying anytime soon.” Paula rolled onto her side and captured Sophie’s lips with her own. “I love making love to you, sweetheart. And I am going to keep doing it until you tire of me.”

“That will never happen. I need you too much, Paula. And truthfully, it scares me. Earlier when I thought I was going to lose you, I wanted to …”

“Wait, what?” said Paula, propping her head up on her arm, looking squarely into Sophie’s eyes. “You thought I was going to break it off with you? Just because of a little fight?”

Sophie just looked at Paula, confused. “Little fight? I thought that was a doozy. And you were so angry with me and you thought I was childish … I just assumed …”

“Oh, baby,” breathed Paula, “we are going to fight because we don’t see eye to eye sometimes. That’s just the yin and yang of relationships. I can’t believe you thought I was just going to throw in the towel on us. Listen, I am in this for the long haul, do you hear me? I am not going anywhere, no matter how frustrated or angry I get about whatever. You are so special to me and I am not going to let you go. Understood?”

“Understood,” grinned Sophie. “Now, come here and spoon me. I want your body next to mine so I can sleep properly. You know I have gotten so used to sleeping next to you that now when I am at home and in bed alone, I can’t bloody sleep?!”

“Mmmmm, I’d like nothing better,” purred Paula as she snuggled up behind her lover. “Make up sex is pretty spectacular, don’t you think? Maybe we should fight more often.”

Sophie playfully slapped at Paula’s arm. “I’d rather not, babe. Regular sex is just fine by me.”

“Ah, you’re no fun, Webster.”

“That’s not what you were saying about five minutes ago when you was screaming my name …”

“Fair point! Good night, baby. Sleep well.” Paula wrapped her arms firmly around her love and settled in for what would only be a few hours of sleep. But, that was ok, because everything was right again with them and Paula relaxed into the feeling and fell fast asleep.


End file.
